Monday, January 24, 2011

I Am Superman

226.6 lbs. If you have been reading long enough, you know how this works. Here is a short recap: I eat lots of protein, fat, beans, veggies during the week and Saturday I go crazy, go nuts, on bad bad bad food. Sunday means I am bloated and Monday still shows the residual effects, scale wise. I did take one single pic of Saturday's gluttony, it was donuts. Mmmm donuts.

To kind of give you an idea of what binge day entails, here is a rundown of almost everything I ate:

  • 4 eggs with 8 ounces of chorizo (it's what I normally eat for breakfast most days)
  • 4 Donuts
  • Bacon wrapped shrimp (lost count)
  • Fried shrimp (lost count)
  • A sushi roll
  • A plate of teriyaki chicken
  • 4 egg rolls
  • 2 tea cakes (mocha cream)
  • A plate of sweet and sour Chicken
  • 2 large pot stickers
  • A quarter of a pumpkin cheesecake pie
  • Lots of diet Dr. Pepper
I also added a new twist, cinnamon. Cinnamon is a wonderful blood sugar (glucose) regulator. It tends to smooth out spikes and evens out the effect of sugar intake. I can tell you that, as simple as it sounds, it works. I didn't feel nearly as many highs and lows and intestinal craziness I had during the last binge day. Here is a an odd little tidbit: after all of this my body fat content went down. Soon I will start posting those BF% numbers as well. If I had the disposable income, I would invest in a Bod Pod session, it's more accurate but I am not JP Morgan (mainly because he is dead). We will look at BF% at the end of each week beginning this week. BF% will be much more important as we head further down the river into the heart of darkness. I hear a nice fellow named Colonel Kurtz lives there.

I feel thinner today, not in a psychological sense. Ever run your hand down your belly and it just feels smaller? My belly has been rubbed more than Buddha's lately. Allowing my hand to run down my belly was like hitting a under shelf on a sheer cliff face. If my hand were a cliff climber he would have certainly plunged to his death, there was very little impeding his demise. It's a bit different now. Far from complaining about my rotundity in the past, I have to be thankful it was not as hard as an over inflated inner tube. You see, if I had one of those tight round bellies, I would have to combat the fact that fat had surrounded my organs and pushed my abdominal wall out. The thought of my organs being all squished up by fat and stretching the muscular bands of my pelvic girdle scares me a bit; it's physical precursor of eventual heart disease and other maladies. So thank God for such tender mercies.

There are also other signals that perhaps the fat and muscle are trading places even while I lose weight, all my tight muscle shirts are no longer tight. Now don't make me explain why an obese man in his 40's thinks it's perfectly okay to run around in shirts with an "athletic cut", I just do. I love the small tight graphic t-shirts. More specifically, I like the small tight music or superhero t-shirts. I wore my "Green Lantern" shirt yesterday and the thing draped on me. I know I have made this point about clothes before but this one blew my mind a bit. I even asked Christy if we had done something special with the laundry lately. Like there is some setting on the drier that says "Make This Shit Huge".

After putting on the shirt I also noticed something odd, the arms were still fairly tight though the middle section had grown bigger somehow. I started to imagine little gnomes were coming into my room and changing out my clothes at night just to mess with me. No, I was not high. Also in the arm-ish area were these big ripples that people sometimes refer to as triceps. I am not sure why people refer to parts of their body as some sort of horned dinosaur, but there they were. The glaciers of fat had receded and there was muscle underneath, imagine that. I would have preferred that the glacier receded to expose some sort of cool alien earth base (yes, I have seen too much Science Fiction, why do you ask?) but I'll take what I can get.

Channeling my inner Jeane Dixon, I am going to say (and hope) that I will be counting pounds in sub-20's this week. Anything sub 220 will be a success and anything else will be absolute failure. If I fail, I have to sit and go the opposite way and be the world's fattest man for my next experiment. I hear there is more money in it.

I almost forgot, I am running a couple of other experiments simultaneously. One on purpose, one on accident. We'll discuss these tomorrow. Ciao baby!

"I am Superman and I know what's happening!"

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