Thursday, January 13, 2011


So I am now on Day 4 of "The Experiment". My body seems to be adjusting. Today, I have not killed any small animals with my gaseous emanations... so far. The U.S. Geological Service came by the house yesterday whining that my little eruptions were causing earthquake sensors to give off false readings. Whatever. If they would invest in better measuring equipment, like I have, I am quite sure they wouldn't have to come and and bother me or waste their precious time.

Before the USGS came by to hassle me, I purchased a digital scale for the whopping sum of $15. The thing is fantastic. It measures weight in .2 increments and I can actually see the readings without going through the myriad of stupidity I went through earlier in the week. So, what was the super duper accurate reading this morning? 229.0 lbs.

The scale has not been the only adjustment I have had to make this week. I also have had an avocado every other day since Tuesday. I just wasn't getting enough potassium and after a few hellacious cramps, I decided that, outside of supplements, avocados were my best bet. In addition, I cooked up some lentils last night for today's meal and I have not set off one earthquake sensor. Beans, beans the magical fruit, have been sent to the sidelines for a bit because I was not happy playing that popular game called "Did I Just Shit My Pants?" every single hour of the day. It's been nice not sounding like Satan's tuba today.

I have gone back and forth on boiled eggs. I keep thinking of Paul Newman and that infamous scene in Cool Hand Luke. Man that scene made me ill. Spinach might be traded out for something else soon because it is getting a little boring and the cheap balsamic vinegar I use to make it palatable just stinks up the office. All in all, I would say I have been happy with some of my diet choices.

Knowing that I can eat anything I want on Saturday, I have been trying to figure out what I would eat. My ever supportive wife, despite being rumbled out of bed by my loud ass, even asked me to think about it. To be honest, I have no clue. My cravings have become more and more fleeting. I am sure I will think of something but with the progress I seem to have made this week, scale be damned, I don't really want to go out and screw it up. The thing is, you are required to binge on your off day, there are no exceptions. There are numerous reasons for this that have to do with body chemistry and metabolism so I can't really skip it or take shortcuts by eating lots of healthy stuff.

Help me out, post some suggestions below or on the link I post to Facebook. What would you eat in one day if you could choose anything you wanted?

"Oh teenage hopes are alive at your door, left you with nothing, now they want some more"

1 comment:

  1. My dear sweet husband...the possibilities are limitless, as are my choices...but a small number of the 'anything' I would choose would include: Reece's Eggs, biscuits and gravy, Ajo Als Queso Chicken, pizza, jalapeno poppers, and a cheese and bread nosh-fest. No surprises there. What is your favorite thing to eat EVER! That's what we'll have.